February 15-22, 2008 –
9-16 Adar 1, 5768
There
will be no Shabbat-O-Gram next week
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Contents
of the Shabbat O Gram:
(Click
to scroll down)
The (Occasionally) Ranting Rabbi
Mitzvah/Tzedakkah
Opportunities
The Beth El Bar/Bat
Mitzvah Commentary
Required Reading and Action Items (links
to key articles on Israel and Jewish life)
“Scenes from
a Wedding”
Last Sunday, Danielle Tuluca
and Sam Sterman
were “married” as part of the
7th grade’s
exploration of the Jewish
lifecycle. Keep checking our
website, www.tbe.org for more photos of the wedding,
Quote for the Week
PLURALISM: a condition in which distinct groups, with various modes
of expressing their Jewishness, are present and tolerated within a community,
and the belief that such a condition is desirable or beneficial….to acknowledge
and embrace the place of a person within the community even if we know they are
wrong.
- The Venture Cyclist (Blog)
Candle lighting: 5:10 pm on Friday, February 15, 2008. For Havdalah times, other Jewish
calendar information, and to download a Jewish calendar to your PDA, click on http://www.hebcal.com/. To see the festivals of other faiths as well,
go to http://www.interfaithcalendar.org/. The United Synagogue has updated its
candlelighting information. To learn more, click here.
THE FULL SERVICE SCHEDULE NOW APPEARS ON THE
SEPARATE TBE ANNOUNCEMENTS E-MAIL
Shabbat Services:
6:30 Friday night in the chapel
6:45 Tot Shabbat
Shabbat morning @ 9:30, Children’s services at
10:30
Morning Minyan:
7:30 Weekdays (including this Monday, Presidents Day), 9:30 Sundays
WE’VE BEEN
HAVING DIFFICULTY OF LATE ACHIEVING A MINYAN EACH DAY. PEOPLE WHO ARE SAYING KADDISH NEED YOUR
HELP! PLEASE COME TO MINYAN!
TO ENSURE A “GUARANTEED MINYAN” FOR THE DAY OF
YOUR YAHRZEIT – GO TO THE ROSNER MINYAN MAKER AT WWW.TBE.ORG
AND THEN NOTIFY OUR OFFICE.
Now you can become more comfortable with the prayers of our
morning service by heading to…
http://www.tbe.org/site/sog/minyanmastery.htm
Reminder of our “No
School No Shul” policy: On days when Stamford
Torah Reading For
Shabbat Morning
Torah Portion:
Tetzave
Torah Portion: Exodus 27:20 - 30:10
1: 27:20-28:5
2: 28:6-9
3: 28:10-12
4: 28:13-17
5: 28:18-21
6: 28:22-25
7: 28:26-30
maf:
30:8-10
Haftarah: Ezekiel 43:10 - 43:27
- myjewishlearning.com
- Torah
from JTS
- JTS Podcasts
- American Jewish University
- Academy for Jewish Religion
21-14-(5)
No,
that’s not the Super Bowl score I was hoping for… in fact it is our score thus
far in 2008 for morning minyan.
According to Peter Weissman, who tirelessly monitors and helps run the
minyan every day, we have had 10 or more people on 21 occasions, fewer than 10
on 14 occasions, and on 5 of those 14 we have had a total of 9 adults, enabling
us to say an official Kaddish. (When we have 9, our policy is to open the ark
to enable the Torah to represent the tenth adult). So, in effect, we have gone without a minyan,
official or otherwise, about one third of the time since New Years Day.
That
simply won’t do.
The
good news is that we remain this area’s only viable egalitarian daily morning
minyan. None of our neighboring
Conservative shuls have one. The other
good news is that whenever people request a “Guaranteed Minyan,” we almost
always succeed in getting one. Another
bit of good news is that nearly 100 signed up to come once a month in response
to our request to honor Frank Rosner on his 95th birthday. Many of those who made the commitment have been
coming.
Truly
we can look at the glass as being half full.
Even when we don’t attain a minyan, we usually are close. And if you look at our roster of minyanaires,
a wide cross section of the congregation is represented. Hardly a day goes by without someone coming
here to commemorate a yahrzeit or ask for a healing prayer to be recited. Each of these is an opportunity for me and
others to reach out and demonstrate that ours is a warm and caring community. Many guests from other congregations have also
found that to be the case when they’ve availed themselves of our services (pun
intended). Also, a number of our lay
leaders have demonstrated admirable commitment to the minyan, including our
president, who is here quite often, and the UJF president, who is often here as
well. The minyan is almost entirely lay
led, with congregants like Gerry Ginsburg,
One
could make the argument that minyan is the most important thing we do here.
That’s
why we will fight to keep it strong and make it stronger. We are assembling a task force for the
morning minyan and need your ideas. If
you would like to be part of this task force – and we promise that its work
will be short term with few meetings – please let me know. One suggestion that has already been made is
that we appeal especially to those who drop off at
Aside
from helping others – which in itself is a prime reason to attend – there is
the fact that we also get the chance to pray, meditate, be thankful, and sort
out our day as it is about to begin.
Those who wish some background material on the prayers are welcome to
peruse our Minyan Mastery web page at http://www.tbe.org/site/sog/minyanmastery.htm. But no
one needs to worry about being less than an expert a these things. Simply by being there you are doing the
greatest mitzvah of all. The best task
force of all would be for a people simply to commit to coming once a week, or a
couple of times a month – whenever you can.
I
will be away next week, so I am hoping that one new person will be there each
day to replace me on Sunday at 9:30 and on weekdays at 7:30 (including Monday,
although a holiday). I thank you in
advance for filling up this half full glass all the way!
Flames
This week’s portion, Tetzaveh, speaks
of the eternal light kindled in the Mishkan in the Wilderness. This has been a week to ponder both the
creative and destructive power of fire, from old flames rekindled on Valentines
Day to the destructive flames of a synagogue burining.
You likely heard of the horrible fire
at our sister synagogue, just across the sound,
Fortunately, the damage was limited to
just part of the structure, and the sanctuary and Torahs were saved. At the synagogue’s website, http://www.tign.org/,
a message from the rabbi inspires them – and us – to continue their important
work undaunted by the destructive flames.
We’ll think of them and pray for them as we gather to worship here this
Shabbat:
A Message from Rabbi Stecker
Now that the fire is behind us and the television cameras have largely receded,
we and our many friends have begun the work of cleaning and repairing our
beloved
Tonight and tomorrow, we will celebrate Shabbat. Shabbat is the day when
we consider the importance of our work and the nature of our
surroundings.
Our work has been, and will continue to be, to create a warm, safe and sacred
environment for the education of our children.
Our work has been, and will continue to be, to celebrate good times together
and to sustain each other through difficult times.
Our work has been, and will continue to be, to bring whatever light we can to
the Great Neck community, the wider community, the Jewish people and all
humanity.
As for our surroundings, we are truly blessed. Within
When we light candles tonight, when we join to welcome Shabbat, when we hear
tomorrow's Torah portion regarding the ner
tamid, the eternal light, we can consider both how difficult a week this
has been, and how fortunate we are.
Fortunate that we are called upon to do important work. Fortunate that we
are surrounded by capable, supportive people. Fortunate that we have what
it takes to keep our ner tamid
aglow in the weeks, months and years ahead.
We will all get through this together and we will emerge even brighter.
Shabbat Shalom to everyone!
Rabbi Howard Stecker
Here is a commentary on this week’s
portion, focusing on those eternal flames, from the Ziegler Rabbinical Program
of the American Jewish University.
During tomorrow morning’s service, we’ll look at this eternal light from
a variety of perspectives:
One of the most
terrifying aspects of getting married is the idea of making a commitment to one
person for the rest of their life. One of the most daunting responsibilities of
parenthood is knowing that another life is dependent on you forever. Even going
to the pound to get a pet can intimidate because of the permanence of the
commitment. In a society of people terrified by commitment, in a world in which
people worry about what they might be giving up, what options they might be foreclosing,
or that they might simply get bored by a particular relationship, the idea of a
dependency that lasts forever is a frightening one indeed.
One of the ways we lull ourselves into a willingness to commit is by disguising
the extent of our own interdependence. Rather than facing the full extent of a
marriage, we assure ourselves that it's only one day at a time, that the back
door is always open. We delude ourselves that life will return to normal once
the kids grow up and move away on their own. And we never think about the
extent of our involvement to our aging parents or our adult siblings. Ours is a
culture that always keeps an eye on the exit, one foot out the door. I gotta be
me.
Jewish culture offers a healthy alternative to the independent nature of
American relationships. In fact, our Torah portion offers an interesting and
unexpected perspective that might be helpful in our own age.
Parashat Tetzaveh speaks of the erection of the Mishkan (the Tabernacle)
in the wilderness. This was
Always sensitive to unusual language, the rabbis of the Talmud notice that the
Hebrew translates literally as 'to cause the light to go up continually.' So
they explain that phrase to mean that 'he [the priest] kindles the light until
the flame rises by itself.' In other words, the kohen must care for the light
until it can maintain itself without his direct involvement. It's not enough
just to light the flames, he is also responsible for assuring that they can
continue to burn without his immediate attention.
In that regard, the care that the kohen lavishes over the Ner Tamid is
not unlike the commitment we make whenever we enter a relationship as well. It
comes as no surprise to parents that initiating that connection implies guiding
the children to their own independence: good parenting doesn't stop with the
immediate physical needs of the children, but extends to giving them the
insight, values, and self-confidence to be able to maintain themselves after
the parents are no longer there. Purchasing a pet from the pound involves a
commitment to be there for the animal long after the immediate thrill has
dissipated, ensuring that the pet can sustain itself throughout its lifetime.
So, too, with elderly parents, good children provide for their parents'
physical and emotional needs so that they too can shine on their own.
The light of the Ner Tamid shines into the recesses of human
relationships, mandating that we care in such a way that the recipient of our
love is strengthened by our involvement, is better able to cope with life on
their own. The kohen cares, as it were, for the dignity of the Ner Tamid,
providing it with the ability to shine on its own. We, too, must care for each
other so that our mutual dignity is fortified, so that resilience,
independence, and wellbeing are all enhanced by our love and our care.
One difference between living things and the Ner Tamid, however, has to
do with permanence. While the Ner Tamid can definitively be established
so it can flame on its own, no human being is ever fully independent, ever a
finished product. The instruction to cultivate it until it can burn on its own
is really a commandment to be constantly involved, to open ourselves to
life-long commitments to those we love: our spouses, our parents, our siblings,
our children, and our friends.
Just as God's love and care never ends, so our own must become eternal as well.
Shabbat Shalom
Mitzvah/Tzedakkah
Opportunities
Beth El Cares:
Inreach and
Outreach
Mitzvah Suggestion for the Week
The Continuing Plight of Sderot
From Jan Gaines:
Dear Friends: Things are building to
a crisis here and I don't know how long Olmert can hang on. The Sderot
situation is untenable. Protests about it are now gathering steam.
Livni, the Foreign Minister, has been discussing the status of
From Yitzchak Sokoloff of Keshet
Tours (who has visited TBE several times)
A letter written to some rabbis who
have led trips with Keshet
Haverim,
I'm sure that you have been following the terrible reports
out of Sderot, as described in this report below. Hundreds of
people from Sderot have been in
Having been in Sderot itself frequently these last months, members of the Keshet staff felt that we should do whatever possible to support the Sderot residents spiritually and materially. As a result, we have been providing hot meals for the protesters, as well as heaters, sleeping bags and mattresses. We are donating our staff time and equipment, but would appreciate assistance in funding the food that we are providing, at a cost of about $400 per day.
Anyone who would like to assist us to assist the
residents of Sderot at this important time are welcome to pledge contributions
for Sderot relief. We will be using these funds to supplement our efforts to
feed the Sderot resident in
You are also welcome to forward this e-mail to any friends you think might be interested in assisting us- perhaps with a sentence about your own experience with Keshet.
Thank you,
Yitzhak Sokoloff
Executive Director
Keshet: The Center for Educational Tourism in
Sent:
Sun, 10 Feb 2008
Subject: A SABBATH UNDER FIRE IN SDEROT
NOAM BEDEIN
Director, Regional News Service for Sderot and
the
12 Rakefet Street
Sderot, Israel
Messages: 03 636 4017
A SABBATH UNDER FIRE IN SDEROT AND ITS AFTERMATH.
On Saturday night the 9th of
February, two brothers 19 and 8 year old, Rami and Osher Twito, borrowed their
mother's credit card to go to the Sderot ATM machine to buy after shave lotion
as a birthday present for their father.
Within moments, they were lying next to each other in a pool
of blood on a Sderot side walk.
Pieces of their legs
scattered on the street. One of Osher's legs was immediately
severed.
Osher's second
leg was shattered. Rami and Osher were running
for their lives after they heard the RED COLOR siren. They didn't have enough
time to run for the shelter which was 100
meters away, knowing that they only had 15 seconds until
the kassam missile would explode.
Tens of Sderots
residents ran to help the boys. Then another siren went off, and
they all ran for the shelter once again.. A few minutes later, a few
residents started to scream to the crowd :
" Let's go
block the streets!!" They started chanted: We want a military
solution!
We want the army to do
what's right and to fight the enemy!"
There was utter despair on
the people's faces - helplessness of the fathers and mothers
carrying their children.
What a Sabbath in
Sderot, with 40 missile attacks fired at Sderot.
Thinking about Friday
night. Sitting at a Sabbath dinner with the Gad Family. Hava Gad is
the Sderot Parents Association spokeswoman A siren was fired while the soup was
being served.
The whole family took
cover in their hall way, which is the safest place in the house.
The missile fell across
the street. A boom rocked the house. Hava collapsed. Tzfania her
husband , a reserve military officer, leaned over Hava, calming her
down. Their 9 year old son- Yanai played his own
role supporting with his mother, calming her down,
A few seconds later
another explosion. And then another one… It quiets down and everyone returned
to the Sabbath table
And then another missile
attack. Tsfania opened the back door for their puppy to hide for shelter
in their hall way.
Hava, bent
over eve more than before, said that she is going to
throw up. Tsfania holds her tight
Yanai, once again
comforting his mother, mentions, matter of factly, that on Friday
morning a missile exploded in the soccer field next to their
school, and that they were lucky that they weren't allowed to go
out, for security reasons…
As the meal finished,
the children played games on the floor, and then, an enormous explosion…
This time, Hava
screamed and collapsed on the floor, shivering… Tsfania went to the
other room to get her a pill, and asked her if he should call an
ambulance to evacuate her.
Yaani again
hugged and kissed her, telling her that it fell a blocks away from
here and that there is nothing to worry about… Yaani looked up and said
that they should learn medicine in school, for cases like
these… A fourth grader who sees himself as a paramedic at the age of
nine.
Walking the
streets of Sderot on the Sabbath afternoon, to get a
feeling about what people are going through, a few brave children
went out to play in the sunny beautiful day.
Every group of children
had something had something to do with the rocket reality
A four year old,
mumbling while playing next to the synagogue- 'Tseva Adom, Tseva Adom'
"RED COLOR RED COLOR"…
And
then there was the nearby Sderot Ethiopian community , where children
were arguing with each other , debating , which school was hit more by the
rockets… Children were playing with toys, throwing them up to the
air, and yelling- "A Kassam!" and then make a noise of an explosion…
Watching these
children, you think of the recent statement from Dr Roni
Beger from
Dr. Adrianna
Katz, head of the Sderot Mental Health Center, notes
that most of these
Children are going to be
affected for life…
And then there was the
perspective of the experts –
Dr. Reuven Ehrlich, the head of Intelligence and
Tzachi Hanegbi, chairman
of the Knesset Foreign Affairs and Security Committee, last Tuesday
requested ten minutes of air time on the Voice of Israel Radio newsreel, where
he demanded that the Israeli army kill the terrorists who give the
orders to fire the missiles…not only the missile launchers. In other
words, to kill
For some reason,
HaNegbi's suggestion has not been picked up.
At the same time, at least 800 homes here in Sderot have no protected
rooms where someone can take cover during a missile attack. Prime
Minister Olmert has vetoed the offer of a private
philanthropist to fund to install these protected rooms. Why?
Olmert's office does not answer as to why he places 800 families in a life
threatening situation in their own homes
Yet the unkindest
cut of all came from
On Thursday, the
Meanwhile, not one
Jewish group and not one human rights organization issued a single statement of
protest or horror about our city under siege.
Bar/Bat Mitzvah Projects:
Keep watching
for projects to appear in this space….
KADDISH FOR JUST HOW LONG, IN A LEAP YEAR?
Source – the Midway Jewish Center Cyber-Shul and my
colleague Rabbi Rafi Rank
Dear Cyber Rav,
I know that Kaddish is generally recited for 11 months. But
it’s a leap year and the year is not 12 months but 13? It would therefore
seem that I should say kaddish for 12 months. Now my sister has done a
little research into the matter and she discovered that just about everybody
says that even in a leap year, kaddish is recited for 11 months. And from
one Orthodox site, she found the following— The period that the mourner recites
the Kaddish for parents is, theoretically, a full calendar year. The deceased
is considered to be under Divine judgment for that period.
Some communities, therefore, adhere to the custom that Kaddish be recited for
12 months in all cases. However, because the full year is considered to be the
duration of judgment for the wicked, and we presume that our parents do not
fall into that category, the practice in most communities is to recite the
Kaddish for only 11 months. Even on leap years, which last thirteen months, the
Kaddish is recited for only 11 months.
So CyberRav, I am confused—do you say 11, 12 or possibly even 13?
In Mourning, But for How Long?
Dear In Mourning,